The first thing you should know about me is that I don’t see gender. I assume I’m a man because my favorite band is Slayer and I’ve never thrown away a pair of underwear.
So, when I tell you that I, probably a man, have ridden the new Joy series of women-specific skis from Head, and would gladly recommend any of them to lady rippers, you can rest assured that I’m a serious person whose opinions should be taken seriously.
That’s because these Joy skis are a bit of a marvel: light-but-powerful, and nimble-yet-precise. By all accounts, the key is a futuristic material called graphene. You’re no doubt familiar with graphene from the 2010 Nobel Prize in Physics–which it won with, I assume, the help of some scientists. Here’s what I semi-understand about graphene from skimming Wikipedia: it’s a sheet of graphite that is exactly, and impossibly, one carbon atom thick. This two-dimensional material is about as light as matter can get, yet has 300 times the strength of steel. I’ve heard it also grants wishes, but I have no evidence to support that. I’ll just say this: the day after I skied on the Great Joy, I found two Canadian quarters in the dryer. Spooky stuff.
The mad geniuses in the Head development labs combined that graphene material with their ERA 3.0 Technology — long the life-blood of the acclaimed Head REV series of men’s all-mountain skis–which consists of 20% tip rocker to ease turn initiation, a progressive radius for a longer effective edge when carving a turn, and piezoelectric intellifibers at the front of the ski to smooth out harsh vibrations at reckless speeds. Interestingly, “Piezoelectric Intellifibers” is the name of my folk-metal-ska fusion band. You should check us out.
Each Joy ski shares those essential characteristics under the hood and, thus, provides a similar world-class ride on snow. In addition, the 75mm-underfoot Super Joy and the 85mm-wide Total Joy, the most aggressive skis of the series, are further reinforced by layers of koroyd and carbon for even more power and stability.
My only reservation about these skis is that each model appears to have been given a totally arbitrary name that makes it impossible for me to remember which is which. In order of increasing width, first comes the skinny Pure Joy at 73mm-underfoot and with, of course, the tightest turn radius (11m in the 158cm length). The Super Joy clocks in next, followed by the Absolut Joy at 79mm-wide, and the Total Joy. Now for the big dogs: the Great Joy (my favorite of the bunch as a Colorado quiver-of-one) swells to 98mm-wide with an unsinkable 141mm tip, and the powder-hunting Big Joy, queen of them all, is 110mm at the waist but maintains a nimble 15m turn radius in the 168cm size.
I dare you to remember that.
So, if you’re someone who likes things that are awesome, or has always wanted a ski that was possibly built by a team of ancient wizards, it’s worth taking a peek at the Head Joys. They can do anything worth doing on a mountain–and they do it about as well as it can be done. They also look pretty sweet. You’re welcome.
