Warrior athletes? In our minds. Really, we dudes are overgrown children. But you ladies already knew that. Now, shop for us as if you were buying toys for 200-pound toddlers who can drive and you will make our holidays bright.
1. Bergans of Norway Humle
Sure, it sounds as if it walked out of your Swedish grandfather’s men’s shop, but this is quite simply that thing you buy for us that we never remove from our bodies. This hoodie is comfortable from the moment you put it on—and it also comes in women’s versions, so you don’t have to steal it. $189; bergans.com
2. S.O.G. Tactical Tomahawk
It’s simple. Every dude needs a tomahawk. We can chop things like firewood. Get our Natty Bumpo on and practice tossing it. Feel it as a metonym for … well you get it. This tomahawk is a functional work of art, built with 420 stainless steel and a fiberglass, nylon-reinforced handle. $64; sogknives.com
3. Tenkara Iwana
Does your man single speed and tele? Buy him a Tenkara, a classy, more-sporting reel-less Japanese rod that is the ideal weapon for the small trout in Front Range streams. $160; tenkarausa.com
4. GoPro HD Hero 3
Oh, we love to look at ourselves doing cool shit. Nothing preserves our manly exploits in higher quality better than the latest GoPro. The Black Edition captures hi-res video and features wireless compatibility. $400; gopro.com/HERO3
5. Prana Mojo Chakra
What guys say when we run into each other at the yoga studio: “Oh, you do this too.” Pause. “Dude, it is going to be great for my skiing.” Fact is we do it for the mind-body connection and ability to realign our bodies. These pants make us look a little cooler. $80; prana.com
6. Looptworks Luhu
This repurposed case, made from excess shoe leather, gives a sexy feel to that iPad that everyone else is sporting in the cafe. $70; looptworks.com
7. Blundstone 585
It dresses up. It kicks back. The beefy sole handles everything from European cobblestones to Utah hikes. It’s the original shit-kicker, too—it came from Aussie sheep farms. $165; blundstoneus.com
8. Backcountry Access Float 32
There is no guarantee that backcountry skiing and snowboarding are safe, and there is no substitute for proper training, practice and sound judgement when it comes to the backcountry. None. But The Float 32 just may be the best chance you have if you get stuck in a slide. $550; backcountryaccess.com
9. Rossignol Super 7
We men are truly no different than we were when we were kids. We need to have the best toy. The current best toy on the ski hill is hands down the Super 7. Quite simply they do it all—big rockered boards that hold an edge. $750; rossignol.com
10. PORN
MAP porn, that is. Plan a route on Trimble Outdoors web page and then have a fully-laminated, waterproof custom MyTopo map sent to you as quickly as overnight. $15; trimbleoutdoors.com •
